Free Phone Consultation February 2011
Hello there! If you are new here, you might want to subscribe to the RSS feed for updates on this topic.Powered by WP Greet Box WordPress PluginShareHello Ladies,
I want to tell you how amazing you are,
and in honor of your incredibility, I'd like to offer
a 1-on-1 20 minutes phone chat with me at no
cost to you.
Here's what you need to do:
1. Watch this youtube video and let the words sink down
into your heart.
2. Ask me any dating related question in the comment section below, what
do you want help with right now? Is it building his interest, is it increasing his
attraction? Is it how to respond to him to create a deeper bond? Is it how to
get him to see you as his dream girl? What is it you'd like help with right now
in your love life? What have you done to increase in your own personal power so that
you can create what you want in your love life?
Be one of the first 10 to post, leave your first name and email address and you will get an email from me with more details on when I'll call you.
Note: Must be available to chat Saturday Morning between 8:30am and 11:30 am.
Talk soon,
Nicole
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How do you handle when a man knows you see a future with him, but he tells you he does not know where he sees you, he just knows you will always be close and have a connection?
Maintain that closeness and see where it leads, because you have to be friends before you can be a significant other, and the reason for that is; when the "honeymoon" stage ends, the friendship endures and you still like each other.
Hello!
My question is this : I seem to attract a lot of guys, but my problem seems to lie in keeping them interested. Any tips on how to transition smoothly from that time when you first meet a guy, to the time where you have a deeper bond?
Thanks!
Gabriella Kennedy
Fortunelogos@aol.com
I can't seem to get past 3 dates! I'm confused as to how to know and or build his interest to continue dating, I feel like I am missing something in this equation!!
How do you get past a mistake such as opening your mouth and saying things that you should never have divulged and which angered the guy?
Nicole, Can you get my last name off of this blog?
Darlene, I’ve removed your last name.
Ladies, first name or nick name is fine with me. Please do not share your last name if you don’t feel comfortable with this:)
How to get him to see you as his dream woman? How do I peak his interest again ?
Any ideas on how to recover from being too emotional with a man? It's a long distance relationship and we're still talking but he's not asking to see me.
How to get him to commit
To be the his dream girl
Hi Nicole!
When is a good time to start talking about the future??? I've been in a relationship with a 2 year divorced father of 3. Divorce was messy and mean!
Liz
What kind of girl gets the full interest of a mr unavailable?
Hello how do you let a man know u are interested in him without coming right out saying it to him?
Nicole~
Nicole I am 44 and I just started seeing a really great guy however he is 38 he does have all his crap together, so your opinion on this please.
Nicole I have just stared dating this reat guy he has his life in order and treats me like a lady in every way. However I am 44 and he is 38, your opinion please.
Christie
@ Christie, age is irrelevant. If you read my recent post, I wrote about a man who’s been chasing me for months and whether I should give him a chance. He’s 26, I’m 36. See the post here: http://www.attractingmenmastery.com/2011/02/should-i-give-a-younger-man-a-chance/
What really matters is the undeniable connection you share, this connection really goes past attraction. It has a language of it’s own. If you both share this, then open yourself up to what this connection can contribute to your life.
Here’s what happened after I decided to open myself to the connection I feel with this younger man: http://www.attractingmenmastery.com/2011/02/he-kissed-me-last-night/
Best of luck and keep us posted!!
Dear Nicole,
I met this guy on New Years Eve and we hooked up. Then he told me that he does not want to start a relationship at the moment, because he is still not over his ex-gf, he needs to focus on his studies, and he might move abroad. So I accepted that and said I respect his decision. He added me on facebook, we started chatting and flirting via facebook chat. I tried to detach myself emotionally from him, started to date other guys and not be available to him online.
Then he wrote me and asked me and two of our friends if we want to go on a ski vacation together. The other friends (who are a married couple) said no, because they cannot afford it. I said that I might be interested (but that was before the others said no). So then he suggested we go together, just the two of us. I said ok, so now we have booked a skivacation in April.
I can feel that he is interested in me and that he likes me. He also told me that he sees me as girlfriend potential, that he thinks I am a desirable woman and he likes me, but he is not in love with me yet (we have only met each other twice in our lives). He also said that althoug he thinks I am gf material, he does not know how I feel about him. I also told him that I like him, but am not in love with him, that it takes me a while to fall in love with a guy (I was trying to play hard to get). When i said that, i could feel he was a bit hurt, since there are many girls chasing him and want to start a relationship with him, and he is rather hesitant because of the issues mentioned. So the situation is: we like each other, but we are not in love (yet), we talk on a daily basis as friends, we are going skiing together, as friends, and then we will see what happens. He said there is a chance he will fall in love with me, and I do not feel the same way about him, or the other way around.
All in all it seems like the guy is confused about what he wants, on the one hand he does not a relationship now, on the other hand it seems like he can't help that he wants to talk to me and he is interested in me.
So I was wondering if you have any good advice for the trip – so that his attraction and interest develop into something more? I am working very hard on my self-esteem at the moment and I think I have made a lot of progress. When my ex broke up with me 5 months ago, I was devastated, but it also made me so much stronger. Now he is actually writing me and he wants me back – but I am not into him anymore and know that we were wrong for each other.
I look forward to your advices!
Naza
@ Naza, I think you’re making a huge mistake booking a trip with someone you hardly know and already have deeper feelings of attraction for when it is clear that he is confused and want you for a cushion to get over his ex-girlfriend. It’s not a good idea to hang with him because he is in a stage where his emotions needs an ego boost because he’s not yet over his past relationships so he needs to feel desirable and attractive. You’re providing him with that without him providing you with any certaintity of how he really feels.
The best thing for you to do is to NOT go by your instinct. If you understood the primitive brain and how the mind really works with the reward centers in the brain, you will stay away to allow this man to fully flush his ex out of his system before seeking to have “convenient” hookups or sex with him. His attention towards you on facebook is just his attention seeking pleasure center wanting a reward. You’re appealing to his animalistic brain and that’s all. He’s saying all of the mumbo jumbo about you being girlfriend material and I’m not saying he’s lying but I think it’s what you need to hear and believe…but he isn’t sure about you so this means he just sees you as someone who he’s sexually attracted to.
Men can compartmentalize sex. If you started on a hookup basis, this is what he’ll come to expect and this is what he’s GOING to expect when you go on your ski trip. You’re fooling yourself if you think that you too can be together along as “friends” on a ski trip together and not sleep together. It just doesn’t work like this.
When a man is serious about you, he won’t tell you only after a few dates that there is a chance he could fall in love with you…he’ll fall in love THEN tell you he’s IN LOVE…so all of this heavy talking about falling in love and girlfriend material stuff is a waste of time.
You’re right. He’s confused and when men are confused it means they are just physically/sexually attracted to you and like you just enough to have sex with you. It means his interest level is low and although he might like to have a good time, it doesn’t mean it will necessarily go further.
In my opinion, you should cancel the trip because he’s no where ready for the attraction with you to develop into anything more because his emotions aren’t “cleared” out of the old relationship so you can’t do anything to force the process. If you want to build his attraction/interest, you have to do it on a different platform. Usually people take trips to celebrate something they already “built”…
What he told you in the beginning is how he really feels, “he’s not ready for a relationship, he’s not over his ex-girlfriend, he needs to focus on his study and he might move abroad.” this is HIS truth, this is reality…please pay attention so that you don’t “create” something completely different from his original story.
Love,
Nicole
Nicole,
I met a man online 3 months ago. He just moved to the same city as I this month. When we lived apart, we spoke quite a bit on the phone, texted, emailed etc. When we finally met in person, everything was great. We had a great first date, physically and emotionally connected to each other. He texted that night, said he had a great time as I did. We met up again a few weeks later, again, another great date. Since then we've been in contact, and I can tell that he is interested, however he isn't contacting me like he used to. I find myself being the one to first send a text, and recently ask him to get together. He will respond to my text/email but now it's not right away like before. We'll get together and have a great time like before and he points out movies that we should see or restaurants we should go to, but doens't make plans. He married his high school sweetheart and was married for 10 years, together with her for almost 20! I don't know if he is just out of practice when it comes to dating, but shouldn't he be the one to contact me? I've seen him online on the dating site that we met on, so I'm assuming he is dating other people…how to I get him to focus on me and realize what a catch I am!! This is so frustrating, everything was going so well
hi Nicole,
i came into contact with this guy. We started dating and one day he told me his family hate my tribe and that he cannot denied his family for my sake. Do you think he did the right thing by betraying the love that we share? Please help me.
@ Annie, unless you are his wife, then you wouldn’t be considered his family. It is difficult for him to have been loyal to you, if there wasn’t a deep foundation between you and him or deeper obligations like him being your husband or if you had children. The reason why he did that is because he didn’t see you as “family” although he may have loved you so it was easier for him to be loyal to his family over you.
Hi Ncole
Love the new website ~ Great and concise writing style– so much easy to read than Christan Carter's posts… although I love his advices too.
My question is : I know I may sound abit silly but here it comes: I have been single since last July and I have been dating with different guys, but no one I have been intimated with so far. Not even a French kiss actually, so as I am talking to different guys and getting to know them, I found myself start concerning about their sex life… because I am dating but in celibate and I have sexual needs as a grown woman. For me, have been single and sexless for this long, I do sometimes wonder how long a grown and an attractive man can go without any sex … I know its not my business if we were not in a committed relationship, but I am rather concerned with the men I have been dating.. and wondering if they have any body they keep to have sex with or something like that…
Is my question clear??? Anyway , welcome your take on this issue…Thanx alot!
@ oooli, thanks for the compliment about the site:)
As for your question, you are right to feel concerned about a man’s sexual history. As far as wondering about how long men can go without sex, I don’t think the average man goes very long without sex so although they might enjoy your company and like being around you, you can be sure they are more than likely getting their sexual needs met elsewhere. If I were you, I would bring up the talk around sexuality if a man starts becoming really affectionate like kissing you or making out with you because it means he wants to move it towards having sex with you. If they aren’t moving in that direction, then it’s probably a good idea to just wait to have the chat. You can also say something like, “It’s none of my business how many women you’ve slept with, but if we start to get intimate, I want to be sure that you are healthy, so are you willing to talk about your sexual health?”
If a man isn’t willing to devulge at least some information around his sexual health, then it is a good indicator that you should avoid sleeping with him.
@ Yvette, I’ve removed your last name:)